I know what you've been thinking. "Doot de doot, where's Chad been lately? I have such a small dick, and without him around, I haven't had a boner in weeks!" Well I haven't been just sitting around jerkin' the gherkin like you nut shufflers. I've been doing detective work to find out WHO HACKED MY E-MAIL ACCOUNT!
I'm close. So close. But for once in my life, I need your help, Chad-SPEAKS. Over the past weeks, I have collected a series of clues in my investigations. But they are so cryptic! Whoever is behind this Internet-jacking, which is also what I call it when I look at porn, must be as clever as Tom Cruise in Mission Impossible 2. Just 2, not the other ones. No matter! I need somebody who can help me decode these clues. I need you.
I'M SO CLOSE I CAN TASTE IT AND IT TASTES GOOD LIKE BEEF RAMEN!!! LET'S DO THIS FOR THE TEAM, FOR GOD, FOR COUNTRY, FOR JIMMY BUFFET!
Oh, and Ricky says hi.
Chad Henne
Forwarded by Ricky Williams
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