I was not planning on heralding the final judgment of man so soon, or indeed, planning on making such an announcement on a blogspot site, but your past week of wallowing in sinful smut has convinced my father, Machine Gun God. I hope you all enjoyed luscious lady week, because those may be the last luscious ladies you see for the rest of eternity. And that 50th blogiversary party sure looked like fun! Too bad you didn't have any room for the holy spirit at your little shindig.
To those of you who are pure of heart, the true believers, in about a week's time, depending on how crazy traffic is this Memorial Day weekend, shall be ushered up to heaven, where you shall live in harmony. The rest of you sinners--and you know who you are--shall remain on Earth, and prepare to face the final machine gun judgment.
I hope I have made myself abundantly clear.
Best,
Machine Gun Jesus
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